City Hall Jokes
Political dictionary
Economic Development – in the normal world economic development is measured by investment of private dollars in relation to businesses opened and jobs created. In Niagara Falls subsidized low income housing, grants to failing businesses and ribbon cuttings at drug treatment facilities pass for economic development.
The mayor and three of his department heads walk into a bar. The mayor turns to the bartender and says, “Give these three disruptive, disloyal and unproductive people all the drinks they want because I’m firing them tomorrow.”
City Hall Handbook of Common Protocol, page 37: When cutting the ribbon on an alcohol abuse treatment facility the mayor or designated mayoral representative shall cut the ribbon and then immediately throw out the first drunk in recognition of the occasion.
Answer: “It’s a Man’s World.”
Question: What is Kristen Grandinetti’s least favorite James Brown song?
Answer: Drug users, sex abusers and business loan choosers.
Question: Name three rhyming elements of the Dyster economic development plan.
The phrase “The suspense is killing me” was said by:
A) Vladimir Putin as he awaited his re-election results.
B) Everyone in Times Square as they await the ball drop.
C) Andrew Touma as he anticipates the firing of three Dyster department heads.
D) All of the above
The most popular novel in city hall: Ernest Hemingway’s “For Whom the Bell Tolls.”
“What about me? You wasted $400,000 to renovate the park land I gave you and my memorial stone is still missing a $75 plaque!”
The spirit of Luther Jayne
